The ringing of the phone broke the silence; Hart had forgotten to shut it off before he began his meditation. He quickly broke away from the feeling of warmth and balance that he had just achieved.
Everything was becoming more emotionally intense, the deeper he went the more the feeling of love filled him. He glanced at the clock as he raced towards the phone, six o’clock! He had been under almost seven hours! He certainly felt refreshed. With this thought he lunged for the phone.
“Hi Geoff, it’s Tom, I hope I didn’t wake your lazy ass”
“No sir I was doing the afternoon waltz on the astral plane, it just went a little longer than normal. So, what’s up?”
“I am Just calling to confirm tonight, nine o’clock at the Weasel?”
“I am glad you called! Is your beautiful wife coming?”
“She sure is! She never misses a chance to watch us make asses out of ourselves”
“Great! It wouldn’t be the same without her! Besides, you’ll need a DD”
“So it’s going to be that kind of night is it? Haha…. Alright bro, I will let you get back to your dream world and I will see you in a couple of hours”
“Talk to you later Tom”
As Hart hung up the phone Tom’s words started to ring in his ears… get back to the dream world, he then noticed his dream journal on the table… that was it!
That is where he recognized the man in the coffee shop from, it was the man in the dream he had the night before, the man that Hart had saved by chasing him down the mountain; and then he just disappeared into nowhere. He had a surge of energy rise up his spine and start to pool in the back of his head. But what did it mean?
Hart knew there was something very important transpiring, but he also knew not to over think it because that is when labels start to attach themselves and labels force expectation upon the situation instead of allowing it to develop and grow on its own, true life and meaning could be lost.
Hart liked it when things fell into place like this, these little coincidences indicated he was on the right path. He couldn’t wait to see what happened next! But first Karaoke.
Karaoke was the common ground in which Tom and Geoff founded their friendship, back when Hart was an employee of Toms working in construction while attending university, the topic of Karaoke came up in reference to a Saturday night when Tom had gone out and sang for the first time. Hart being somewhat of a Karaoke veteran quickly expressed his fondness of singing and they quickly made plans for the following Friday night.
Shortly thereafter Tom bought a big screen TV and a Karaoke machine…. the rest is history! It soon became a love that they both passionately shared. It could have been because it presented a chance for them to express themselves in a way that separated them from the monotonous lives that bound them from experiencing their other, more exuberant creative selves.
It wasn’t about being good or bad (although they were pretty good), it was about stepping outside a comfort zone, outside of society’s box, and being themselves if even for just a few simple moments.
Besides it was something that Tom’s wife could enjoy as well, Deloris even sang with the best of them! Breaking out the Madonna after a couple of wobbly pops.
It wasn’t only the singing that promoted their creative expression, but the dancing. The three of them would sing and dance the night away as if nobody else were there.
The dancing was more of a Tom and Deloris thing because they had been taking dance classes for quite some time, even participating in competitions for as long as they had known each other.
Watching them was like seeing art created. Watching Hart go at it was like watching a young Michael Jackson during an epileptic seizure; nevertheless, it was the expression that was important! It got exciting when Tom started his break dancing though!
The thought of a nice relaxing night with some good friends really sounded like the perfect way to get Harts brain recharged to prepare for the long vital stretch that lay before him. There was a gentle calm that settled over him and he knew that everything is unfolding as it should.
Hart rejuvenated himself with a shower and swiftly got dressed. The phone rang with a double ring that suggested it was the front door. He glanced at the clock, it was 8:30, that must be the taxi that he called before his shower. He answered the phone.
“Yes, sir this is your taxi”
“I will be right down, give me five minutes; start your meter if you like”
“I will be waiting out front sir”
Hart hung up the phone and started moving a little faster. He didn’t like to make people wait as it suggested a lack of respect for someone’s time. He grabbed his wallet, keys and jacket, turned off all the lights and was off.
He took a look at the dream journal and the man in his dream crossed his mind one last time before he shut the door and promised himself a brain dead evening of fun.
As he approached the Waltzing Weasel, years of memories came flooding back. Hart, Tom and Deloris had been coming to the same place for as many years as they had known each other, there had been many people join the Karaoke crew during these years but the original three stayed intact while the others just dropped in occasionally for a blast from the past.
It was nice to come to the same place for so long because the owners and most of the staff had known them for years and made them feel at home as themselves, not the major shareholders in a multimillion dollar corporation and a well-recognized psychologist.
Although we would be subjected to the occasional person seeking some free psychological advice or pitching an idea to Tom and Deloris in hopes of financial backing of some sort. But this didn’t matter because these three were just some normal people having a nice night out and they loved the everyday feel of this place and the people.
Hart walked in to find Tom and Deloris were already there, at the usual table in front of the Karaoke stage, this gave them easy access to the mic and the dance floor.
There on the table was a gin and tonic waiting for him. All of this gave him a feeling of familiarity that usually comforted him and allowed him the time to relax his overactive mind, but not today, he suddenly had a feeling like something in the core of his being was forcing its way to the surface.
He administered the regular energetic greetings to everyone and then sat down and started to notice the feeling growing stronger by the second.
He had been faced many times with similar such feelings and trained himself to explore them with an open mind to learn and grow from it.
Being as open minded as he was Hart often contended with hundreds of thoughts that flowed in and out of him like a river of cold fire, this was often the source of all his ground-breaking work. Being in tune with himself at this level also enabled him to suppress the thoughts until he had time to explore them thoroughly in a state of meditation.
After a couple of deep cleansing breaths, he was able to keep the feeling at bay for now.
After He collected himself, the Karaoke trio began a nice pleasant night of song and dance. Watching Tom and Deloris dance was incredible as it reminded him of one of the reasons he respected them so much. In a world of labels and expectation that chisel away at our concepts of relationships, their relationship was like a breath of fresh air.
Hart believed that love was the only thing that truly exists, love does not beget perfect relationship, perfect relationship begets love. Love was not a signal that is transmitted between two separate beings whereas the dynamics cannot even be remotely understood in terms of science or spirituality, but a connection that is established between the heart and mind where truth and understanding was the awakening.
Love can only exist in true form when it is found within oneself. When true love is found it is then available to be shared with others. Some people reflect this love in each other and it creates an extraordinary feeling of connection to everything, the same feeling of warmth and serenity.
Some people do experience this sort of love but associate it with a feeling that is sent and received from another person, then they fall to pieces when that person leaves or does not reciprocate these emotions as if they were a source of love to be lost.
As the feeling becomes associated with that person, the life that it brings becomes bound together and every similar feeling is then compared and contrasted to that relationship either falling short or exceeding expectations.
In either case it takes away from the unique life and growth of each new relationship. They seem to spend their lives looking for other people that fit that description emotionally and will give them the same intensity or fall into a deep depression coming to the realization that they might never get it back. The one chance they had at happiness is gone and it must have been their fault! Why didn’t they try harder to hold on!
Hart was married for a few years and thought he was in love. He had two children that should have contributed to this love but all there was an emptiness that filled him.
Why? He had everything that should make him happy; a wife that says she loved him and children that filled him with warmth. But Harts over analytical mind questioned where he was drawing the information from in order to establish these feelings, where was it all coming from?
What were these feelings before he tried to describe them?
The emptiness soon translated to divorce. He had no feeling of loss, Hart had always had a deep connection with his children and was always a big part of their lives so there was no loss there, but he thought he should have felt the loss of his wife.
He even tried crying to draw out some emotion but couldn’t; it wasn’t that he was detached from these emotions, it was just that he could not reason his way to feeling as if he had lost something.
Shortly after the divorce he found a friend, a woman that reflected the deepest love within him.
Hart with his newfound headspace had been writing some of his first books, they were just thoughts being put on paper then, but it was the beginning of a long spiritual journey that would eventually lead him to where he was today. His main focus was that of relationship itself, but not only in the male/female sense but connections between everything, even the relationship with a chair! The very information we draw from to establish and view our relationships to everything around us.
As he was examining these relationship dynamics he would conduct subtle experiments that would give him incredible insight into the building blocks of relationship. For example, he noticed that sexual tension played an enormous role between not only the members of the opposite sex but those of the same sex, especially men. Also, the lack of communication between everyone was mind numbing, so when he started any sort of relationship with this new woman, he first started by talking about sex.
He just bluntly said “I know this may sound weird, but I want to relieve us of sexual tension, so I propose that we take sex off the table until we feel it to be absolutely appropriate”, because it was the beginning of the relationship she found it quite odd but laughed and agreed.
From that point on Hart had the most amazing time with her and they were able to talk about everything openly and honestly. They achieved a point of complete bliss together that Hart had thought impossible; they could even be completely naked in front of each other seeing each other in the shower and bath. No matter how much they wanted sex they withheld.
They would sleep together, cuddle, kiss and hug, massage and caress, anything but actual sex. They reached a state of intimacy that Hart thought could never exist. It was here he felt a love that has been the fuel for his state of being; he found true love.
As he carried through this relationship he started to see her fall apart in front of him, drugs and alcohol started playing a big role in her life. She was not without her baggage as she was seriously sexually abused as a child and been through many unspeakable horrors.
He was able to help her open her heart and mind to a wonderful love-filled existence, but she quickly got sucked back into her state of intense conflict.
Hart had a gift to see to the core of people and he knew it was unlikely she was going to progress from this point and the conflict was consuming her. As soon as it started affecting his life, he just left.
They had achieved the emotional maturity of a long-term relationship in a fraction of the time by not misusing the intense power of sexual energy. Had they engaged in sexual relations, it could have prolonged the unnecessary pain of an incompatible relationship. Hart knew quickly that she was not the one, but he had a much better understanding of what that truly was.
After he left he noticed that the intense love was still there and still growing. He again felt no loss, instead he felt like he had found the thing he had been searching for. He felt bad that she had chosen a path of misery and despair, but it was her choice. He would never forget the gift she gave him.
Hart found that some people do reflect those wondrous feelings, but the source of those feelings came from within. This is when he concluded that a functional relationship is when two people live separate lives together. They do not draw love from each other but share the love they have inside with each other. When they are apart they carry the others love with them, but when they are together the love unifies them as one being where there is no identifiable place where one begins and the other ends. There is no jealousy because communication is open, and they know their individual paths will go where they will, and sometimes that is not in the same direction. But for now it is, so enjoy the moment to its fullest.
Hart sat watching Tom and Deloris dancing on the dance floor and it reminded him of what Osho Shri Rajneesh once said, “time cannot exist”. Time exists only in the form of electrical impulses in the brain, memories and the anticipation of things yet to come.
Memories are seldom seen the same by any two people because it is our relationship to that particular moment that will dictate which aspects will bind us to it. We draw upon quite different life experiences to determine which aspects of the moment are more important than others. We therefore see memories completely differently.
The anticipation of the future is based on expectations that draw us into a game of what should or shouldn’t be based on which past moments were more pleasurable. The future seldom adds to the pleasure of the moment but takes away from it by not meeting expectations.
The only thing that truly exists is the moment, the here and now. The past and future can only exist in the distorted thoughts of the moment and this we have complete control of. Tom and Deloris seemed to live in the moment and they found happiness there, at least when they were dancing.
This thought was interrupted by the clapping of hundreds of hands and Tom and Deloris sitting at the table again.
Tom looked at Geoff with a look of confusion “Are you OK, you have been sitting there with an empty look on your face for like 45 minutes, most of the time you won’t shut up”
Deloris laughed and agreed “Yeah Geoff that is true, you usually never shut up, and you haven’t even put a song up yet what is up with that?”
“I think you need a round of shots and a song, I will be right back” Tom got up and started navigating himself up towards the bar.
Deloris looked at Hart “I think Tom is wrong, you need a woman, come on…”
Before Hart could do anything, Deloris grabbed his hand a dragged him out of his seat towards a group of gorgeous women that seemed to be in their early thirties. They may have been having a couple of drinks after work because they were all dressed as if straight from an office.
Deloris did this to him all the time especially after she had a few drinks under her belt, it appeared she got a bit of pleasure watching him squirm and yet, sadly this is usually the only way Hart met women, so he didn’t complain.
“Hi girls, how are you tonight, do you mind if we sit for a moment?”
They all let out a little school girl giggle as if reliving a high school moment “Not at all” The three women all nodded and smiled in approval
“I am Deloris…”
Hart stepped in quickly so as to not look like a 40-year-old virgin “and I am Geoff….”
“Dr. Geoff Hart” Deloris quickly corrected giving the girls the eyebrows up look of approval. “We come here almost every week and haven’t seen you before and wanted to welcome you to our home”
The girls gave a bit of a chuckle and responded by introducing themselves one by one.
“Hi I am Sarah”
“Hello, I’m Lana…” the third woman said as she stood up and smiled directly at Hart sending a provocative shiver up and down his spine.
She had long dark hair and these incredible hazel eyes that lit up the room with her intoxicating smile. Her delicate, fair, soft skin was complimented by her tasteful white blouse that housed her ample, perky breast.
Hart quickly glanced down to see a pair of short cut khaki pants that flattered her perfectly round buttocks. She reached over and offered her hand ever so gracefully “Dr. eh” she said as looked him up and down and smiled with approval “medical doctor?”
Hart, lost in her seductive eyes hesitated in an attempt to muster up some sort of suave response. He didn’t usually fall apart so easily but this woman had such an intense sexual presence that he was stumbling over his own thoughts, he felt like he was the one back in high school.
Deloris swiftly came to his rescue “He is a psychologist, a pretty good one I might add… and available”.
Harts face started to become a soft shade of pink, Deloris always had that matter-of-fact way of pleading Harts case, but the women seemed to find it quite intriguing, probably because a beautiful woman presenting a man as available was either a sister or a good friend and the presentation suggests Hart may be someone she would be interested in had the circumstances been different. Either way it was like getting a pre-approval from a friend and this was a good segue into a comfort zone.
After an uncomfortable moment of playful banter, the moment changed direction as a voice in the background spoke excitedly.
“So are we joining these beautiful ladies because I have a tray of shots coming!” Tom quickly approached the table with a devious smile on his face.
“This is my husband Tom girls, and Tom this is Sarah, Michelle, and Lana”
The girls made their introductions and Lana quickly agreed to the merging of the two groups motioning for Hart to sit next to her. The tray of shooters arrived at the table and the energy just started vibrating around the table like a tornado of young vitality.
Hart was distracted from his usual analytical thoughts; he couldn’t take his eyes off Lana.
After a few drinks he was happy to be called up to do his signature song “One week” by Barenaked Ladies. He was so energized that he hit every note perfectly, everyone whistled and clapped when he was finished as he beamed with confidence making his way back to the table.
Between this performance coupled with a two Phil Collins songs Tom sang, and Deloris with her rendition of “Like a virgin” the three soon stood atop the karaoke mountain as the stars of the show, at least to the table at which they sat.
The girls even swallowed their pride and sang a couple of Shania Twain songs!
There was so much energy at the table but it soon separated into two small groups, Geoff Hart and Lana, and the rest of the table.
He had never felt so infatuated with a woman before; her eyes were so deep and peaceful that he couldn’t stop thinking of the woman that he had been dreaming of, the one he had just seen last night in his elaborate dream that had so deeply occupied his mind all day. She didn’t look like the woman in his dream, but Lana sure made him feel more like himself than any person had made him feel in a long time, and when a journey of self-discovery is your whole purpose, this felt so right. So, when the night came to a close, he didn’t hesitate to ask for her number. He knew that she somewhere somehow would lead him to a path that consisted of a happiness he had only dreamed of.
After he punched Lana’s number into his cell he walked her to the cab where the other girls were waiting, the feeling inside him was so intense that he felt a little awkward and was fumbling over his words as he opened the cab door and attempted a respectable goodbye.
She saw this and gently lunged forward shutting his mouth with a tender kiss. She leaned back and jumped quickly into the cab with a smile gleaming so bright that Hart just stood there paralyzed by its brilliance, the cab started to pull away and Harts body felt like it was being tugged by a number of strings that made him feel like dancing.
His trance was broken by a subtle wink he received from the Taxi driver, it was the Santa Clause looking man that had driven him to corporate plaza earlier that day! This started pushing Harts analytical mind back into full effect, something was happening and there was no doubt in his mind it was big.
He turned around and saw Tom and Deloris standing outside the pub door with huge smiles on their faces. Deloris unable to contain herself quickly spewed forth he series of questions that were ready to explode out of her.
“OK, out with it. Did you get her number?”
“We saw her kiss you, when are you going see her again?”
“Ha! I bet you are happy I brought you over to that table!”
Hart walked over and put his arm around both of them and walked them toward their truck in the parking lot.
“Don’t you guys have lives of your own?”
“What!” Deloris gave Hart a punch in the arm. “I better get some details buddy, it was my victory too!”
They all laughed, Tom and Deloris slowly climbed into their truck. Hart looked at them through the driver window.
“Yes I got her number, I don’t know when I am going to see her again, and thank you guys I had the best night I have had in a long time”
Tom looked over at him “You needed this, you have been under a lot of stress and you need to clear your head. I am very happy you have had your much-needed break from that over active brain of yours. Call me tomorrow let me know how it goes”
“Sure you don’t need a ride home?”
“No thanks Deloris, I think I am going to walk a little, I will phone you guys tomorrow. Have a safe trip home” They both waved as they departed, and Hart started heading towards home thinking what wonderful friends he had.