Ode to Existence
Warm is the breeze when hot is the fart
Cold be the day when beat be the heart
Feel be the warm love when heart be the day
And say be the “I” when I say I’ll stay
Gregory Phoenix
Laughter is a moment free of thought!
There is never an up and down, there is just an outward movement from a point of departure…
I was in deep meditation when I had a vision of being in front of hundreds of people giving an address of some sort when I said this poem. I had never heard it before this vision and it turned out to be one of the most fundamental aspects of my awakening. I remember thinking how serious everyone looked as they stared at me waiting in anticipation of some profound statement or insight that would change their lives. My basic teaching has always been ridding the self of expectation, opinion and intention and here are hundreds of eyes staring at me in anticipation.
I spontaneously bellow “warm is the breeze when hot is the fart…” and the crowd started laughing hysterically. I was astonished how the energy of the room changed so rapidly, it was as if this one statement freed their minds, opened them to receive the message a little less tainted with their conditions. It was at this point that I realized the true power of the direct experience and how you don’t need to be in a deep contemplative state of mediation to achieve Satori, that it happens at any point that your mind is free of thought, and laughter was an amazing tool.
The rest of the poem took me a long time and much contemplative thought to truly understand, and piece by piece it started to become clear. “Cold be the day when beat be the heart…” this was at first an obvious undertone of life versus unity as we generally associate warmth with love and love is what the seeker tends to embrace. The cold day would be a negative repercussion of one placing such importance on life, represented by the beating of the heart, instead of the true way to the heart which seems to be the releasing of the attention that gives the life substance. I soon discovered that Love is the misunderstanding that becomes the glue that holds it all together while the true heart has little to do with life as life always has a beginning. I saw that it was more about the point of departure as “warm be the day when heart be the beat” carries with it the same message (or emotional insurrection) Upon altered perspective it is only the position that you currently refer to as “I” that becomes the determining factor. This sum of your awareness at the place you call here and now becomes your point of departure while you carry on your illusionary movement through time and space.
“Feel be the warm love when heart be the day” the transcendence of any notion that the heart is in any way luring you in any direction can be found in this statement. We must again remember the difference between feeling and emotion. I often put emphasis on the importance of emotional intelligence and what I mean is “Feeling intelligence” which is the final stage to emotional intelligence when all feeling finds its way to the scale of life, where everything becomes a state of intensity that fluctuates with attention based on opening and closing to an already existing current of energetic movement. When we realize that we had no beginning and no end the totality of awareness that you refer to, to find your statement of position, is already in a state of going and the true self has already passed through this point before recognition.
The last statement in the poem in itself can be meditated upon to open doors into the collective unconscious; I can hardly even bring it into my mind without being released of all attachment. “Say be the ‘I’ when I say I’ll stay” this is a direct communication to demonstrate why even though we can represent to ourselves in words the nature of existence, words imply a meaning beyond themselves and then their meaning unique to each point of departure. The power of this statement is displayed in its reference to that which is prior to the construction of the words themselves, the place prior to thought that filters through the point of departure that is the attention placed upon our entire existence, the fuel to our purpose that displays the unknown to us in terms that we never question, that we know that we know and that is prior to thought. It is not the words but what we are trying to describe that gives us purpose and often the purpose is simply to realize that we are just trying to describe that which is already known, if it is already known then why feel the need to describe it unless on some level you don’t believe yourself.
We come to terms with the fact that life and death are the same thing and although we say to ourselves death will relieve us of the pressures of life so why not drink more wine or do more drugs to drown out the shortcomings of my expectations, life can relieve the pressures of death through love, and love is understanding, and understanding is not grasping but letting go.
Every man and every woman is a star. We can then revisit the first statement “Warm is the breeze when hot is the fart…” the state of laughter that represents the freedom of thought to open your mind to receive is part of the very process of uniting your energy with your light body. When we embrace the process of spiritual awakening we realize that the totality of our awareness is in fact a source of energy created through inquiry and is fuel to the purpose of the neighboring stars. The more we let go the brighter we shine and expand to include everything as part of our being and the more it is felt by all that we create uniting all things.
It is easy to see all the things that we have divided ourselves into but not so easy to see that which has divided into us. This is why we can only see the material world with the naked eye.
So even this little poem is a full expression of a process of awakening:
Free your mind of thought.
The thoughtless mind can only be spontaneous; any act of trying to free the mind is just another attempt at grasping. This can be identified in a process of recognize and release, eventually you will recognize every movement as a form of grasping and the release will start arising prior to the recognition. The practice then would be to recognize the environments that compliment this process and place yourself more often in these places e.g. if you are addicted to drugs keep away from the places that remind you of this or promote this behaviour. Keep in mind that there is no difference between a physical movement and a movement in the mind, there is only relationship (conflict) between the two, when mind and body move as one then we are on the right track.
Develop a relationship with your feelings.
Feel things around you. Every thing is known through a certain emotional signature and emotional intelligence allows us to relate to these as such. When you come to a depth of understanding of this process you will be able to feel everything as a simple form of intensity that exists on the scale of love and everything will start to appear as varying states of openness or resistance depending on your point of departure.
The Practice:
Feel who you are, and then feel who you are not. This will eventually lead you to a transformation of astronomical proportions when understanding the play of opposites such as the known and the unknown.
Feel your way to where you are. After you are able to truly feel who you are and who you are not another transformation takes place where you can see in terms of the witness and that which is being witnessed. It is at this point that you can place your attention equally on each point of awareness and realize that if everything were moving the same speed, then nothing would be moving at all, and you lose your point of departure to that which is prior to thought. This cannot be sustained as everything would cease to exist, this is the place between the inhalation and the exhalation of the breath, so you discover that bringing these points as close together as possible without touching is the practice.
You cannot be both the witness and that which is being witnessed at the same time, but you can know one by resting completely in the other, feeling that the other is everything you are not at that point of reference (feel who you are and feel who you are not) it is at this point that you realize you never really need to do anything to be who you are.
Then you feel the eternal Self…
The discovery that who you were before your mother and father conceived you is who you will be when you die and is in fact the sum total of your awareness at this very moment. There is nothing that can be said or done to achieve this awareness, we can only undo or unsay that which has been done or said already, it is this very process that can be felt as love and it can only be felt, it is then that we realize that we are here to discover our light bodies so that they may be united as none.
The practice… Breathe.
Gregory Phoenix
